Mum’s on that Diet again

Please come off that diet Mum

You’re driving us insane.

You’ve thrown out all our ready meals

And purged the fridge again.

Our naughty nibbles are all banned,

Replaced by ‘healthy snacks’

Of celery and carrot sticks

And seeds in plastic packs.

You’re on and off the scales all day

More times it makes us wince.

Then you’re off to Weight Watchers

To check that extra inch.

You scan each label carefully

And count each calorie.

You measure out each spoonful.

You only drink green tea!

Oh give us back our junk food –

Our burgers and our fries,

Our ice cream and our cream cakes

And all those lovely pies.

We love you as you are Mum.

You don’t need to lose weight.

So please give up that diet Mum

And give us all a break!